Thinking It Out Loud



*Warning:  adult language is sprinkled throughout.  In case you didn’t get that from the title.  Read on.  You have been warned.

My favorite author

Lets talk friends.  BadAssery.  It isn’t even a word.  English teachers and purists keep reading.  Or not.  Your judgment can’t touch my BadAssery (that’s funny, not mean)

So basically, in my made up word, I just took BadAss from a noun, to a verb.  A verb is an action word right?  (Now my English teachers are loving this post)  So lets talk about this buzz word…bad ass.  How does one become a bad ass and better yet how do you practice BadAssery?

It’s not for the faint of heart.  It requires a certain amount of willingness to dream alone, think alone, and act alone.  But the real secret to practicing this ancient art?  Surround yourself with others that understand what BadAssery is about.  I want to make this PERFECTLY clear..being a bad ass isn’t about being alone nor is about being…well, an ass.

What does BadAssery Look like?

  1.  It is taking action.  The kind of action that sets the hair on everyone around you on fire but you feel like Buddha.  I am talking about the people around you jumping up and down and shouting “That is AMAZING” or “I can’t believe you DID that”.  Action + Peace=BadAssery.
  2. It is honest.  Being a bad ass doesn’t require a person to lie or hide.  In fact, it requires unrelenting truth and living in the wide open.  Letting one’s choices and the consequences come as they may.  There is Zero spin in this art form  Your actions speak for themselves.
  3. It is INCLUSIVE.  Now pay attention, this point is tricky.  Because so many times this is where a “bad ass-in training” gets this part wrong.  Being a real bad ass means you are working to make your vision, your dream, your goals possible.  And I have secret…are you ready?  You can’t get what you want by being EXCLUSIVE and treating others as if they don’t matter.  That will come back and bite you in the proverbial ass every time.  Zig Zigler, one of my favorite practioners of BadAssery, says it best:


4.  And last but not least…BadAssery is about being a champion.  A champion of self and others.  Now, I am not talking about saving others.  That’s Gods job.  Not ours.  I have had to learn that lesson the hard way over and over.  My friends from my single days can attest to this.  I swear, at one point in my dating life, I must have tried to save every “stray dog” that came around.  I learned the errors of my ways believe me!  (It is hard to believe I was every a doormat…and yet it is true.)

And now I will leave you with this song…when I am feeling like I gotta “get up to show up”…this is my go-to song.  I am NOT “America’s Sweetheart” of that you can be certain but I assure you I am down for supporting and cheering for each and every person that is working to build themselves and their lives in the image they only see in their dreams.  I believe in YOU and all that means.  You do NOT have to be the peacekeeper, the perfect person, the person that makes everyone else feel good.  I believe in the YOU wants to rise up and change the world.  That is BadAssery at its finest!

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Next Level Living

“If you want to live a happy life tie it to a goal, not to other people or objects”–Albert Einstein

What is next level living?  Is it only for people lucky enough to be what the world defines as super successful?  You know the ones I am talking about..the celebrities, the powerful, the rich.  The people that “turned up” or are living “life to the fullest” or whatever pithy phrase we say.  Myself included.  Lots of those people look like they are engaging in next level living and I am sure many are.  After all you don’t get to a certain level of fame or fortune without always growing and reaching.  But I happen to know that you are also surrounded by many people that are always in search of the next level of success.  Be it in the professional or personal life.  You might be one of those people!

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Gobble Gobble!

“Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings”–William Arthur Ward

Happy Thanksgiving!  I pray that each of you will be filled with gratitude and love today.  And a whole lot of delicious food.  And then a nap.  Everyone needs a Thanksgiving day nap.  As I type my husband is making the sweet potato casserole and my 13 year old is reading to me a “surprising list of things that are fruits”.  Exact words.  And my heart is filled with joy with the sounds coming from my kitchen.


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Who’s Your Daddy?

“What you see and what you hear depends a great deal on where you are standing. It also depends on what sort of person you are.”
C.S. Lewis, The Magician’s Nephew

So….. who is your daddy? Your daddy being the predominant belief system you view life through.  Where do you stand? In happiness or sadness? What do your thoughts tell you about the world around you? Are we going to hell in a hand basket or are we on our way to the greatest part of humanity? The people in your life:  Are those people lifting you up or tearing your down?  Do you think you are shaping your life or is your life shaping you?  When your car breaks down is it just life and you roll on or is the universe proving that once again, you just can’t get ahead?

Perception is where facts and feelings meet.  The road that bridges the heart and the brain so to speak.  I am ruled heavily by my heart.  I believe in my gut and I believe that overall life is pretty great and that people want to do whats best for themselves and others.  Before you say it…my own mother tells me I am a Pollyanna.  Not sure know what that is?

Pollyanna:  someone who thinks good things will always happen and finds something good in everything. Source: Merriam-Webster’s Learner’s Dictionary.

Totally sounds disgusting doesn’t it?  When I read the definition I rolled my eyes at myself.  Here is the flip side of that perception I live in.  Anger, sadness, hurt, and downright tragedy are truly hard for me to process.  For myself.  I have this innate manner that demands I push through those feelings as fast as I can so I can be happy again.  That sounds good right?  But what if, like the movie “Inside Out”, my refusal to go through all the “bad things” is holding me back?  Can you relate?  Perception.  Where our insides show themselves really. perception-reflection

I have been thinking a lot about perception during this election season.  *Side note…regardless of who we all voted for, aren’t we all SOOOOO glad it is over.  I couldn’t take another advertisement demanding that MY perception of either candidate fall in line with the mostly emotional hogwash the other was painting their opponent as.  Because lets be clear…if the two mainstream candidates where, in fact, as bad as the other said….whoa.  Which brings me back to perception.

Right now, in the United States, the transfer of the highest office has begun.  Teams and policies are being crafted.  But NO power has actually changed hands.   It won’t until January 20th of 2017.  And all around me I have friends that have already perceived and accepted as fact  what they believe will happen as a result of this presidency.  Some are certain that we are headed towards a white supremacy nation, homosexual hating,  unequal rights, nation with the worst corruption in our history.  Some believe that our ship is about to be put back on course with opportunities for jobs and industries exploding and our country once again becoming self sufficient.  And the only thing those two camps of thought have in common?

Donald Trump won the presidency of the United States.

Yep, one thing.  And now two completely, not even in the same solar system, schools of “thought”. That leaves no room for the others view. In case you don’t already know this…that is a lose/lose situation.  By the way, I seem to be related to both camps.  And I thank God for that very fact.  Because hearing both views gives me better insight to the world around me.  And that is always a good thing.  Always.

So what can we do to expand our perceptions?  This doesn’t mean giving up on what your believe or your world view.  I have not intention of being any less of a Pollyanna.  But I can become a stronger person, wife, mother, business owner, friend, daughter, and individual by doing a few things:

  1. Make new friends.  It is scientifically PROVEN that new relationships grow our brain.  New relationships help us to hear and see new things and think new thoughts.  New experiences and new thoughts give us different views.  And even if we don’t agree with the view point, our perception has been expanded.
  2. Travel to different countries or different regions inside your own country.  If this election taught us anything its how different the cities and so called rural areas think.  And for those of you thinking “yeah, those people need to come here”…well try this on for size.  Why don’t you go to “them” whoever the them is.
  3. Study new subjects.  Subjects your know nothing about.  This once again gives us the new thoughts but it ALSO gives us confidence.  When we know more we carry a certain confidence with us and confidence gives us the ability to try more new things.  See what I did there?
  4. Take a breath before you “argue back”.  This is my Achilles heel!  Once my switch has been flipped I tend to forget to breath and go “for the win”.  Demanding that others bow to my “knowledge” in an argument doesn’t have anything to do with making valid points or expanding my perception or anyone else’s.
  5. Journal.  UGH!  I was wrong, this is my ACHILLES heel.  I can’t lie to you guys.  I don’t do this one consistently enough but the thought is that if you journal daily or every other day that your journal will mirror to you what you really believe about your life, past and present.  I would love to hear from some of your diary writers on this point!


I am truly grateful for the experiences and people in my life that constantly expose me and open me to new view points.  I come at life from a positive place.  I just  do.  I understand that I have the benefit of being born into a family that has loved me from day 1 and when you know you are loved you can move mountains.  So my final piece of advice today…if you are reading this right now and thinking to yourself “my life sucks” find a way, any way, to make someone else’s day better and brighter.  Because being loved is great, but bringing the love changes the world.

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Earning Our Worth


“Simple can be harder than complex: You have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. But it’s worth it in the end because once you get there, you can move mountains.”
― Steve Jobs


In our house lately we have been talking a lot about self worth, pay scale, and growth.  I have two teen daughters so a lot of the self worth talk is in conversation with these two, beautiful inside and out, people.  Isn’t a wonder how we as individuals see ourselves when we are younger?  I mean, how can we NOT all see the greatness inside of each of us from the beginning?  Don’t misunderstand me, my girls both have a healthy sense of self however they are also in a time that “different” is bad and we tend to judge ourselves by how others see us.  Teens.  The original pack animal in my opinion.  Can you remember what those days were like for you?  Man, I can.

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